Fuck everyone else, Love who YOU are, Becoming Your Authentic Self

I have consistently struggled with loving myself. This is the plight of being an American women huh?!  As a child, I never was what I thought I should be. I didn’t have the right clothes, I wasn’t pretty enough, I wasn’t smart enough, I was just not good enough. There were always girls who were better than me, at least better than me based on some stupid stereotype I was presented with. I spent years and years trying to be what I thought others wanted me to be.  I would consistently compare and try to become what I saw around me. This was in the age before “Glee”, before everyone was encouraged to be different and unique. Around age 25, I realized this was no longer working. I decided to become me. I decided to live as my authentic self and I was liberated. Let me repeat, I was LIBERATED, like if bras weren’t so expensive, I’d definitely burn one. When I decided to live as my authentic self, what others though of me became unimportant. I am me, take it or leave it. I am still in the process of becoming comfortable with not giving a fuck, at times I second guess myself and get worried, but I have come to learn that trying to be something other than what I am is draining, exhausting, and too much darn work. I have learned that I am outspoken, creative, overly emotional, funny, and kind. I have learned that quite a few people love me for exactly who I am, and while not everyone will, I do, and if I do, then lots of other people probably will too, and if they don’t, oh well. I am getting comfortable with the idea that if I don’t “work” for you, I am confident enough to know how valuable I am and that I will find something/someone else who I do “work” for, who appreciates and loves me for me. Surprisingly, the more “me” that I am, the more friends I have and the more successful I have become. The more “me” I am, the happier I am and the better I am at all the things I love. I have become fearless and  I have learned to love myself. I am working toward realizing that I am pretty fucking awesome, and I bet you can realize too how awesome you are if you start listening to your heart and stop listening to the chaos around you.

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